How many ways can you say crazy?

     Tonight a friend of mine (Jackie) and I were discussing the many ways you can say crazy.  There were the old stand bys of one sandwich shy of a picnic, his elevator doesn’t go to the top (some even say it hasn’t left the ground floor), the lights are on, but nobody is home.  Then she hit me with ‘her cheese has slid off her cracker’ and I fell on the floor.

     It was downhill from there.  We got worse.  They came swiftly nuttier than a fruitcake, one step short of Bedlam, and answering the cuckoo.  He’s one taco short of a combo plate, one brick short of a load, one egg roll short of a PuPu platter.  His rocket is not working on all thrusters. 

     And worse.  She’s such an air head, that the only thing that keeps things from going in one ear and out the other, is the “For Rent” sign in the middle.  He is a few fries short of a happy meal.  He has verbal diarrhea and mental constipation.  I think her sewing machine is out of thread.  Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled. 

     Have you any to add?

About doggonedmysteries

Agented Mystery Writer, Bull Terrier owner--I have one at the present time, Avid gardener.

Posted on November 18, 2009, in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.

  1. Redefined the term “Third Grader”.
    Needs jumper cable leads on her skull.
    Check the air pressure in her head.
    Couldn’t find his butt with both hands if it had a bell on it.
    Someone needs to spackle her mouth closed before the rest of her intelligence escapes.
    Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled.
    His antenna does not pick up all the channels.
    His brain downloads at dial up but uploads at high speed.
    His receiver is off the hook.
    She can speak 200 words a minute with gusts up to 300.

  2. If brains were gas he doesn’t have enough to power an ants gocart around the inside of a Cheerio!

    LOL! I like it!

  3. Not firing on all cylinders
    Doesn’t have elastic in both socks

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